So you got up with him at 4:30? Yeah I was up with him at 1am, for about an hour or so….not that long.

Zach, recounting Quinn’s sleep last night

Our standards for what constitutes a “decent” night kinda scare me.

My brief AP rant

Ok, so I love my Attachment Parenting parents, and a lot of my parenting is inspired by AP. Babywearing and breastfeeding have been sanity-saving tools with Quinn, and (when I have the patience and presence of mind for it) I’ve had very good experiences using gentle discipline methods with my kids.

I also understand that many AP parents feel like they’re fighting the current of “mainstream” parenting and always being told they’re doing it “wrong” and spoiling their kids, etc. That many had an “aha” moment when “finding” AP bc they finally found validation for their own instincts.


It really bugs me when AP parents claim that AP is THE way to parent, and that anyone who doesn’t do any one of the AP practices is “going against their instincts.” For many, breastfeeding, babywearing, cosleeping, etc, do feel very natural. For others, they’re not. Some babies don’t even like being worn, or sleep better on their own (imagine that). Not to mention that, in my opinion at least, all those “AP to-do’s” are just things that may or may not work for you, but the heart of AP is in being attentive to your child and their needs and treating them with love and respect. Which really has nothing to do with what kind of diapers you use.

This was meant to be a short rant and then it got long…dontcha hate it when that happens.

Sometimes when the kids are being especially whiny and ridiculous, Zach will turn to me and say, “Don’t you just LOVE being a parent? Doesn’t it make you feel so HAPPY and FULFILLED?”

Very glad to be doing this with someone who can laugh with me. =)

Phone conversation with my husband this afternoon

  • Zach: So, what kinds of enriching activities do you have going on with the kids this afternoon?
  • Me: Well, Donovan's napping. And right before you called Quinn was playing on the floor while I checked Twitter on my phone.
  • Zach: Ah, so Free Play, then? You know, sometimes I wonder what it is that I'm paying you for.
  • Me: You don't! That's the brilliant part. It's basically just room and board. And the occasional pretty object.

How to have a relaxing flight



Step 1: Have a kid.

Step 2: Take your kid on a lot plane flights between the age of 1 and 2.

Step 3: Go on a flight without your kid.

Step 4: Laugh at all the non-parents who think traveling is stressful.

Bloody Marys also help.

I love this.  Donovan is a well-seasoned traveller, and we just recently took Quinn on his first trip via airplane.  I used to think flying was a pain in the butt… now I actually fantasize about getting to fly on an airplane by myself one day, and how awesome that will be.

A Few Things…


The Daddy Complex is on Facebook.

The Daddy Complex is on Twitter.

The Daddy Complex makes short puppet videos that are on YouTube and Vimeo.

The Daddy Complex is here for your “infotainment.”

The Daddy Complex felt dirty typing “infotainment.”

The Daddy Complex appreciates everyone who’s helped spread the word about The Daddy Complex.

The Daddy Complex enjoys your company.

The Daddy Complex wonders if you wouldn’t mind getting it a beer on your way back.

Do yourselves a favor and give this guy a follow/like/poke/beer. You’re welcome.

Baby sleep


Even three hours feels like a relief, but only barely. People keep giving us conflicting information: our baby slept through the night at 5 weeks, 6 weeks, 2 months, 2 and a half years, 7(!) years. When are we going to sleep again? What’s the truth?

The truth is, for better or worse, that it depends.  Everyone is telling you different things because every baby (and family dynamic) is different.  Some babies start sleeping through the night (which some define as 5-6 continuous hours of sleep, while others mean bedtime to morning uninterrupted) at 6 weeks and stick to it, others keep waking frequently for years. Everything inbetween is normal. 

With my 2 boys, sleep has varied greatly.  Both of them started going longer stretches fairly early on (6-8wks), but then soon enough started waking more frequently again, and just cycled back and forth.  My 3yo started sleeping all the way through the night most nights, sometime between 1-1.5yrs old.  My almost-8month old baby still wakes every few hours, though it also varies by night. has a list of studies of infant sleep which I found fascinating to read.  One specifically looked at 600 babies who were 6 months old, and found that only 16% of them were sleeping through the night every night.  That can be incredibly depressing for a new parent to hear, but I’ve also found that having realistic (aka “low”) expectations helps tremendously with dealing with the sleep deprivation.

Bottom line: don’t expect to get much sleep for the next several months at least.  If you get it sooner than that, great! (though remember it won’t last).  If your baby keeps waking often for a while, well, at least you’ve been mentally prepared for it.  I promise you’ll sleep again one day (at least that’s what I keep telling myself…)